I haven't written anything on here in months....just been busy. Being a single mom is exhausting, and I feel like I have slacked off on a lot of things lately. However, we are all doing well, and I am happy. The kids are happy!
Zayden is Zayden. He is still quirky and funny and sweet and smart! I love him to pieces.
I wanted to come on here to write about Ivy, because she has evolved into a little person, and a wonderful little person! She will be 2 in 2 months! Wow....I can't believe how big my baby has gotten.
She is now talking soooo much now!! She started off a little slower than Zayden with the talking, but at this point she is talking as much as he was at this age. She is now able to speak in long sentences. She speaks conversationally. She still will sometimes give a one or 2 word answer or will see a dog and just yell "doggy" rather than "There is a dog", but more and more she just talks to me like a 2 or 3 year old would. For example, last night during dinner, she turned to me and said, "Mommy this cottage cheese is good. I love it!" ;) She also asks many questions now, which I find very cute....for now. Our next door neighbors have a son who is 6 weeks older than Zayden. His name is Ethan. Zayden and Ethan are great friends. Most evenings when the weather is nice Zivy plays with Ethan while us mom's chat. Last week Ethan's mom told me, "I think Ivy speaks as well as Ethan." I told her "no way....yes Ivy speaks well, but not like an almost 4 year old." She continued with, "She doesn't speak as clearly as Ethan, but her sentence structure is about the same as his." I felt proud to hear this grade school teacher compliment Ivy....even if it isn't completely true.
Ivy also has taken on an obsession similar to Z's obsession with guys. She loves BABIES. Real and fake. I guess it's a girl thing. Since, I haven't had a girl before, I didn't know. I didn't encourage it, but my goodness Ivy could play with babies all day long!! She mostly just likes to put them to bed and cover them with blankets and then pick them back up and repeat. She also likes to push them in strollers.....each baby has to have it's own blanket though! It is so fun to watch her rock and "sing" to the babies as well. Our other next door neighbor has a 4 month old baby named Riley, and a dog named Abby. Ivy can't get enough of either of them. All day long I hear, "I see Dabby and Riley!!" (I think Dabby is Doggy and Abby combined...Ivy coined the nickname and now all the kids call her that...and so do I). Dabby and Riley come out to play in the evenings too with their mommy to Ivy's ultimate joy! Ivy also will ask over and over to hold Riley which I'll help Ivy do briefly. Ivy's greatest love after babies is probably dogs! So after holding Riley she loves to play with Dabby. And I swear she is probably going to be talking me into getting another dog someday soon. ugh!
Ivy also totally loves her brother. She wants to do whatever he is doing, and repeats what he says ALL the time!! She is like his little parrot. They play well together now....when they aren't trying to kill each other. ;) ha!
She also is just so wild. I hear so many people say that boys are always the wild ones....um not at this house!! Zayden is much more cautious than Ivy. Ivy will climb up anything, will run out into the street, run from me, go flying down the street or driveway at full speed on a ride toy, will run non-stop for 10 minutes around our neighborhood. Z never was that crazy at 1. Oh, and her fits.....HUGE. Much bigger and much more dramatic than Zayden's ever were. She does the whole stomping of the feet and throwing herself on the ground. Sometimes it's hard not to laugh.
However, when she isn't being crazy or throwing fits (which aren't that common) she is the sweetest girl with this smile that just melts me. Often when I hold her, she rubs my back. She gives the best hugs. One day when I picked her up from school, she hugged both teachers and then every kid in the class (there were about 6 or 7) good-bye.
It's fun to look at her now and try to get a glimpse of what she will be like as a teenager or an adult. I think she will be a challenging girl, but also an amazing and wonderful person. I feel so grateful to have her in my life. (I could write about her (and Zayden) all day if I had the time...right now Ivy has woken up from her nap and is yelling, "Mommy and Zayden!" I hope to update more often in this blog).
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Interview with Zayden (age 3)
I copied the interview questions from a friend, because I loved it so much!! :)
1. What is something Mom always says to you? I Love You
2. What makes Mom happy? Me Hugging You
3. What makes Mom sad? When I do things wrong
4. How does your Mom make you laugh? By saying funny words
5. What was your Mom like as a child? Me and Ivy
6. How old is your Mom? 9
7. How tall is your Mom? *Stands on ottoman* This Tall
8. What is her favorite thing to do? Put Ketchup on your head (Starting to get silly with some answers)
9. What does your Mom do when you're not around? Clean Up
10. If your Mom becomes famous, what will it be for? I don't know
11. What is your Mom really good at? Ice Skating (He's never seen me do this yet)
12.What is your mom not good at? Pulling Hair (another silly response)
13. What does your Mom do for her job? Go to work
14. What is your Mom's favorite food? Chicken a la King (I have never eaten that and have no idea where he got that)
15. What makes you proud of your Mom? Your Happiness
16. If your Mom were a cartoon character, who would she be? Silly Lady Gaga
17. What do you and your Mom do together? Play Jousting and Candyland
18. How are you and your Mom the same? We both play fun games together
19. How are you and your Mom different? My eyes are dark brown, and your eyes are light brown
20. How do you know your Mom loves you? Because it's so true
21. Where is your Mom's favorite place to go? The museum
LOVED HIS ANSWERS
1. What is something Mom always says to you? I Love You
2. What makes Mom happy? Me Hugging You
3. What makes Mom sad? When I do things wrong
4. How does your Mom make you laugh? By saying funny words
5. What was your Mom like as a child? Me and Ivy
6. How old is your Mom? 9
7. How tall is your Mom? *Stands on ottoman* This Tall
8. What is her favorite thing to do? Put Ketchup on your head (Starting to get silly with some answers)
9. What does your Mom do when you're not around? Clean Up
10. If your Mom becomes famous, what will it be for? I don't know
11. What is your Mom really good at? Ice Skating (He's never seen me do this yet)
12.What is your mom not good at? Pulling Hair (another silly response)
13. What does your Mom do for her job? Go to work
14. What is your Mom's favorite food? Chicken a la King (I have never eaten that and have no idea where he got that)
15. What makes you proud of your Mom? Your Happiness
16. If your Mom were a cartoon character, who would she be? Silly Lady Gaga
17. What do you and your Mom do together? Play Jousting and Candyland
18. How are you and your Mom the same? We both play fun games together
19. How are you and your Mom different? My eyes are dark brown, and your eyes are light brown
20. How do you know your Mom loves you? Because it's so true
21. Where is your Mom's favorite place to go? The museum
LOVED HIS ANSWERS
Friday, January 1, 2010
New year, new decade, new start!
I am excited about all the newness, and look forward to all the great things that will come. I am embracing this new life I am living, and I have a feeling this next year and decade will be pretty spectacular.
10 resolutions for 2010:
1. I will finally lose all that baby weight. I now weigh less than I did when I got pregnant with Ivy, but still have 15-20 pounds to lose from my pregnancy with Zayden.
2. I will strive to keep a cleaner house.
3. I will stop texting and playing on my phone while I am driving. (bad habit)
4. I will not spend so much time on the computer or messing with my phone when I am with my children. Instead, I will enjoy THEM.
5. I will exercise regularly. I will work out for AT LEAST 30 minutes 3x/week.
6. I will eat healthier, and make sure I eat more fruits and vegetables.
7. I will pay off my credit card debt, and not acquire any more of it.
8. I will finally do something with the zillion pictures I have.
9. I will take my children on a vacation. I won't let this single mom thing keep us from still experiencing a great and fun-filled life.
10. I will be happy in the moment. I won't spend so much time looking forward to: my kids sleeping, my kids coming home, me going out to dinner with a friend, my work day to be over, etc....... Instead I will just be happy in the moment that I am currently living.
AND 10 resolutions for the next decade:
1. I will be in excellent physical shape, by exercising, eating healthy, and living an active lifestyle.
2. I will buy another house that will give us more room for all of our "stuff".
3. I will be in a healthy relationship with an honest and respectful man who loves me, and I will be madly in love with him as well.
4. I will have a habit of maintaining a clean home.
5. I will be much more organized in all aspects of my life.
6. I will raise my kids to be unbelievable little people who are very kind and compassionate.
7. I will enjoy cooking regularly, and cooking healthy family meals.
8. I will travel to Europe again.
9. I will get involved more deeply in a charity that is meaningful to me, by doing a mission or something similar.
10. I will be kind to everyone in my presence.
10 resolutions for 2010:
1. I will finally lose all that baby weight. I now weigh less than I did when I got pregnant with Ivy, but still have 15-20 pounds to lose from my pregnancy with Zayden.
2. I will strive to keep a cleaner house.
3. I will stop texting and playing on my phone while I am driving. (bad habit)
4. I will not spend so much time on the computer or messing with my phone when I am with my children. Instead, I will enjoy THEM.
5. I will exercise regularly. I will work out for AT LEAST 30 minutes 3x/week.
6. I will eat healthier, and make sure I eat more fruits and vegetables.
7. I will pay off my credit card debt, and not acquire any more of it.
8. I will finally do something with the zillion pictures I have.
9. I will take my children on a vacation. I won't let this single mom thing keep us from still experiencing a great and fun-filled life.
10. I will be happy in the moment. I won't spend so much time looking forward to: my kids sleeping, my kids coming home, me going out to dinner with a friend, my work day to be over, etc....... Instead I will just be happy in the moment that I am currently living.
AND 10 resolutions for the next decade:
1. I will be in excellent physical shape, by exercising, eating healthy, and living an active lifestyle.
2. I will buy another house that will give us more room for all of our "stuff".
3. I will be in a healthy relationship with an honest and respectful man who loves me, and I will be madly in love with him as well.
4. I will have a habit of maintaining a clean home.
5. I will be much more organized in all aspects of my life.
6. I will raise my kids to be unbelievable little people who are very kind and compassionate.
7. I will enjoy cooking regularly, and cooking healthy family meals.
8. I will travel to Europe again.
9. I will get involved more deeply in a charity that is meaningful to me, by doing a mission or something similar.
10. I will be kind to everyone in my presence.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Ivy Brag
Ivy has earned some bragging moments. I cannot help but compare my 2 kids. They have many similarities but more differences. Both seem to have picked up their communicative skills quickly which is nice. However, in the past whenever I talked about Ivy's language I would always say something like, "Yes, she has a lot of words, but No where near as many as her brother did at this age." Poor Ivy. She has so many other strengths, that hopefully someday she won't mind that I said that.
And now, her language is just exploding. She amazes me every day with all that she says, and at the same time it kind of makes me sad because it just means she is growing up so fast. She is 17 months old. She has well over 100 words now. I lost track somewhere in the 90's and she has said MANY more since then. I lost track with Z at this same age (must be when the vocab exploded for both of them), but he had about 200 words then. ;)
However, I think Ivy is superseding Z when it comes to putting words together and sentences. If I remember correctly Z didn't really start independently putting words together until 18 months, and Ivy is now doing it all. the. time. Her favorite word is "I" (LOL), and she has many I phrases that she uses appropriately. Here are some of her sentences/phrases:
I do
I love you
I do too
I too
I cold
I strong (my most recent fave)
I potty
I poop
I done
me too
no way
Look Giraffe (yesterday when she wanted to show me her toy)
I like blue (blueberries)
I want mommy
Where are you
I don't want
and once said all together: I want mommy. bye daddy. bye pawpaw. <3
I'm sure I am forgetting some, but those are the ones I hear most often. Also her understanding amazes me. She understands the concept of 2. She knows hot vs cold. If I say One, she will say two, three, four. She is starting to try to say her abc's, sing old mac donald, and I have even heard her say a few words of twinkle twinkle little star. If she sees toy letters, or a large letter in a book she always points to it and says E or O. LOL. The point being that she at least recognizes what letters are, even if she thinks they are all E's and O's.
I'm so grateful for my smart lil babies. (Although the fact that they are happy and healthy is what makes me MOST grateful) :) Okay brag done for the moment.
Hopefully I'll update on Christmas and such next post.
And now, her language is just exploding. She amazes me every day with all that she says, and at the same time it kind of makes me sad because it just means she is growing up so fast. She is 17 months old. She has well over 100 words now. I lost track somewhere in the 90's and she has said MANY more since then. I lost track with Z at this same age (must be when the vocab exploded for both of them), but he had about 200 words then. ;)
However, I think Ivy is superseding Z when it comes to putting words together and sentences. If I remember correctly Z didn't really start independently putting words together until 18 months, and Ivy is now doing it all. the. time. Her favorite word is "I" (LOL), and she has many I phrases that she uses appropriately. Here are some of her sentences/phrases:
I do
I love you
I do too
I too
I cold
I strong (my most recent fave)
I potty
I poop
I done
me too
no way
Look Giraffe (yesterday when she wanted to show me her toy)
I like blue (blueberries)
I want mommy
Where are you
I don't want
and once said all together: I want mommy. bye daddy. bye pawpaw. <3
I'm sure I am forgetting some, but those are the ones I hear most often. Also her understanding amazes me. She understands the concept of 2. She knows hot vs cold. If I say One, she will say two, three, four. She is starting to try to say her abc's, sing old mac donald, and I have even heard her say a few words of twinkle twinkle little star. If she sees toy letters, or a large letter in a book she always points to it and says E or O. LOL. The point being that she at least recognizes what letters are, even if she thinks they are all E's and O's.
I'm so grateful for my smart lil babies. (Although the fact that they are happy and healthy is what makes me MOST grateful) :) Okay brag done for the moment.
Hopefully I'll update on Christmas and such next post.
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Newest milestone
Ivy now totally understands the concept of ..............pooping. :)
She has been saying poop while or afterwards for a couple days now and reaching back to her bottom. Today she was reaching back and saying poop, so I checked and there was nothing.
I put her on the toilet for her first time. She sat there happily for a minute but nothing happened. I put her diaper back on and about 5 minutes later she came up to me and said "I poop". And she sure did! The the whole time I was changing her diaper she kept sayin "I poop".
Only a mom would think this was absolutely adorable. :-).
She has been saying poop while or afterwards for a couple days now and reaching back to her bottom. Today she was reaching back and saying poop, so I checked and there was nothing.
I put her on the toilet for her first time. She sat there happily for a minute but nothing happened. I put her diaper back on and about 5 minutes later she came up to me and said "I poop". And she sure did! The the whole time I was changing her diaper she kept sayin "I poop".
Only a mom would think this was absolutely adorable. :-).
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Thanksgiving day funny.
Me: Zayden, I love you. I'm thankful for you.
Z: I'm thankful for God.
Me: that's nice. And why are you thankful for God?
Z: because I love him.
Me: that's really nice zayden. And why do you love him?
Z: because he gives you toys to give to me.
Today and everyday I am eternally thankful for my amazing children and their good health.
Z: I'm thankful for God.
Me: that's nice. And why are you thankful for God?
Z: because I love him.
Me: that's really nice zayden. And why do you love him?
Z: because he gives you toys to give to me.
Today and everyday I am eternally thankful for my amazing children and their good health.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
It is a Glorious Day!!
Zayden no longer has a dairy allergy! I am ecstatic!! The past couple of years have been difficult because of his allergies. I am so thankful that life will be a little easier now for all of us.
I won't have to spend so much extra time at the grocery store reading EVERY SINGLE LABEL. I went grocery shopping tonight, and I didn't realize it could be soo fun!
I won't have to make a big deal about every thing he eats at a restaurant sending servers back and forth to the kitchen to talk to the cooks and management about ingredients!
I won't have to worry about playdates, and him accidentally eating dairy.
I can cook anything I want for all of us for dinner. I can pull out all my old yummy recipes that ALL have dairy in them, and start making those meals for us!!
I could go on and on about how it benefits me, but I am most thankful for how this will benefit Zayden. He now can eat/drink what everyone else around him is eating!! He can experience a much wider variety of foods. He won't have to worry about having separate snacks at school or birthday parties, etc... He can just be like all the other kids. :)
I also am so happy that Zayden has done soooo well the past few years with his allergies. He never complained. He never tried to eat something that had dairy in it. In fact he would often ask if something had dairy before eating it, and if he saw cheese in his meal (this happened accidentally once) he made sure to let me know, so that I could get rid of it. He was GREAT!!
The allergist thinks Z grew out of his allergies because we were so diligent about the complete avoidance diet. It worked!!! I really liked our Allergist, but I will be happy if we never see him again. :) Although, he won't let us go completely. Actually he is putting together a website about food allergies. He asked if I would send in a picture of Z eating something with dairy in it, and write a little note about our experiences and successes!! He told me he wants to post that on his home page of his site. So Z will be a little celebrity maybe in the virtual allergy world. ;)
Although dealing with the allergies was rough, I was reminded today how LUCKY I am to have such healthy children!! I was driving to Riley Children's Hospital, and right before I drove into the parking lot I started to say a little prayer. I was going to ask for Z to grow out of his allergy, but then stopped myself. Instead, I told God that Z could have allergies for the rest of his life and the rest of us could all develop them too as long as he just keeps Z and Ivy healthy, and then I thanked him for their health. I am so grateful!!
Then while we were waiting for our appointment we saw a fountain with change in it. I got out penny's for both Z and I to make a wish. Again I had planned to wish for him to grow out of the dairy allergy. I changed my mind again right before throwing in the penny, and then made my wish much more important!
Luckily Z grew out of the allergy anyway!! When we left I did a kartwheel in the parking lot. Z got in the car and I screamed and screamed. Z screamed and screamed too.....not because he was excited about the allergy thing, but because he was excited that we were both screaming so loudly without consequences!! We scared a man walking by our car. ;) I got home and downloaded the song Celebration by Kool and the Gang. We all danced to it, and I did more Kartwheels. It was a glorious day!!
I won't have to spend so much extra time at the grocery store reading EVERY SINGLE LABEL. I went grocery shopping tonight, and I didn't realize it could be soo fun!
I won't have to make a big deal about every thing he eats at a restaurant sending servers back and forth to the kitchen to talk to the cooks and management about ingredients!
I won't have to worry about playdates, and him accidentally eating dairy.
I can cook anything I want for all of us for dinner. I can pull out all my old yummy recipes that ALL have dairy in them, and start making those meals for us!!
I could go on and on about how it benefits me, but I am most thankful for how this will benefit Zayden. He now can eat/drink what everyone else around him is eating!! He can experience a much wider variety of foods. He won't have to worry about having separate snacks at school or birthday parties, etc... He can just be like all the other kids. :)
I also am so happy that Zayden has done soooo well the past few years with his allergies. He never complained. He never tried to eat something that had dairy in it. In fact he would often ask if something had dairy before eating it, and if he saw cheese in his meal (this happened accidentally once) he made sure to let me know, so that I could get rid of it. He was GREAT!!
The allergist thinks Z grew out of his allergies because we were so diligent about the complete avoidance diet. It worked!!! I really liked our Allergist, but I will be happy if we never see him again. :) Although, he won't let us go completely. Actually he is putting together a website about food allergies. He asked if I would send in a picture of Z eating something with dairy in it, and write a little note about our experiences and successes!! He told me he wants to post that on his home page of his site. So Z will be a little celebrity maybe in the virtual allergy world. ;)
Although dealing with the allergies was rough, I was reminded today how LUCKY I am to have such healthy children!! I was driving to Riley Children's Hospital, and right before I drove into the parking lot I started to say a little prayer. I was going to ask for Z to grow out of his allergy, but then stopped myself. Instead, I told God that Z could have allergies for the rest of his life and the rest of us could all develop them too as long as he just keeps Z and Ivy healthy, and then I thanked him for their health. I am so grateful!!
Then while we were waiting for our appointment we saw a fountain with change in it. I got out penny's for both Z and I to make a wish. Again I had planned to wish for him to grow out of the dairy allergy. I changed my mind again right before throwing in the penny, and then made my wish much more important!
Luckily Z grew out of the allergy anyway!! When we left I did a kartwheel in the parking lot. Z got in the car and I screamed and screamed. Z screamed and screamed too.....not because he was excited about the allergy thing, but because he was excited that we were both screaming so loudly without consequences!! We scared a man walking by our car. ;) I got home and downloaded the song Celebration by Kool and the Gang. We all danced to it, and I did more Kartwheels. It was a glorious day!!
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Little Miss Ivy
Ivy is exploding with her vocabulary the last 2 weeks. I think she says at least 2 new words every day!! It's awesome!! I love love love hearing her sweet voice, and I get sooo excited every time she says a new word.
I am keeping track of them like I did when Z was a baby. The speech therapists I used to work with instilled that into me.
I have Z's first 200 words written out....somewhere. I stopped counting when he was 17 months and got to 200 words.
Ivy who is not quite 16 months now has 52 words, and many many animal sounds!! She rocks!! :D
Her latest word today was "pretty". I put a little ponytail on the top of her head today, while she sat in the sink and stared at herself in the mirror. I told her she looked pretty. She smiled, and looked at herself closely and then said "pretty". She stared at herself longer and said it about 4 more times!! LOL!! Oh Ivy!! :D
I am keeping track of them like I did when Z was a baby. The speech therapists I used to work with instilled that into me.
I have Z's first 200 words written out....somewhere. I stopped counting when he was 17 months and got to 200 words.
Ivy who is not quite 16 months now has 52 words, and many many animal sounds!! She rocks!! :D
Her latest word today was "pretty". I put a little ponytail on the top of her head today, while she sat in the sink and stared at herself in the mirror. I told her she looked pretty. She smiled, and looked at herself closely and then said "pretty". She stared at herself longer and said it about 4 more times!! LOL!! Oh Ivy!! :D
Zayden Funny
Today I wanted Zayden to go potty before his nap, so I sat him on the toilet.
Z: I don't have to go.
Me: Let's try singing a song, and then maybe you'll go.
I then sing the abcs, and pause after every few letters and Z says, "That isn't working."
Me: Okay, let me turn on the faucet.
Z: That is still not working...........It's working. You cheated!!!
Z: I don't have to go.
Me: Let's try singing a song, and then maybe you'll go.
I then sing the abcs, and pause after every few letters and Z says, "That isn't working."
Me: Okay, let me turn on the faucet.
Z: That is still not working...........It's working. You cheated!!!
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
"Deep Thoughts" uttered by Z man
Last night:
"This is the American Flag! (Pointing at flag on his astronaut costume) Obama gave us this."
"God likes my voice."
"This is the American Flag! (Pointing at flag on his astronaut costume) Obama gave us this."
"God likes my voice."
Sunday, November 1, 2009
When it's over, it's over!!!
Okay a little post about my divorce.
If I were to have my way, we would be divorced by now. We would have a set schedule that was open to some flexibility with the kids, and we could all move on and live our separate but happy lives.
However, things are not happening to my liking. I am trying to be calm about it and just focus on the kids, but it IS frustrating. I am frustrated.
Once the child support amount was set Brian turned into a unreasonable person. He has since gotten another lawyer, and wants to "fight this". However, nothing is happening with him and his lawyer. I ask him 2x/week what his lawyer said, and what is the next step, and he keeps telling me that either a)Brian is busy or b) the lawyer hasn't gotten back in touch with him. I have contacted my lawyer too, and plan to procede on my own with the divorce. However, this will mean the divorce is contested and we will have a hearing which equals A LOT more money on both of our parts. GRRRR! So, I have been trying to get Brian to either tell me he wants to take it to hearing to fight the child support (his only disagreement in the entire paperwork that was drawn up), or that he compromises with me, and we just file together. He is just shuffling his feet and it is so frustrating. And the child support is figured out with a standard formula so that probably wouldn't change anyway. The only way it will change is if Brian fights for joint custody and gets it. This is ridiculous and scary to me at the same time. I won't go into big details about that, but that is pretty much one of my worst nightmares....if it could happen. Seeing as how he lives with his parents and never takes them overnight, etc.... I doubt a judge would rule things that way, but who knows.
Now the other frustration is how present he is in OUR lives. I understand he wants to be part of their lives, but I wish it could be more separate of mine! He wants to come over several evenings a week to just hang out and then read a couple bedtime stories to Z. I let him come over for the kids' sake, but I hate having him here all the time. I know maybe I should tell him not to, but I guess I decide I can suffer a little for the kids' happiness.
He also wants to do things still as a family and that is not in my agenda. I see my family now as the THREE of us, and he isn't included anymore in MY family. He is my kid's dad, but I want to do family things without him.
He often asks if he can do things with us. I try to avoid the topic or make excuses. This week was bad. He knew I was taking the kids to the zoo for ZooBoo. I was very excited about doing this with my kids. 3 minutes before I arrive at the zoo, he calls me. He informs me that HE is at the zoo, and wants to know if he can walk around with us. UGH!!!!!! WTF? Of course I let him. However, it was awkward and uncomfortable.....but slightly helpful I admit to have an extra pair of eyes and hands.
Then on Halloween he wants to go trick or treating with us. I let him of course, but what I didn't count on was his parents joining us too!! Seriously!! He told me they were coming over and taking some pictures and then leaving. Of course that was a lie. They came over and went with us to EVERY house. And it gets better. His mom was wearing a sweatshirt that had a picture of a goofy little boy, and underneath it read, "Proud grandmother of Zayden". LOL!! It is a little funny looking back now, but last night I was pissed. Oh and it still gets better. His mom has a sore leg so after the 3rd house, she went back to get her bright red suv, and then drove along the street beside us throughout the entire neighborhood, parking or pausing in the street in front of each house the kids went to!! This was NOT my idea of a fun time trick or treating as a family.
I did try to not let it get to me though, and I just focused on the kids last night, and enjoyed our evening despite the weirdness. But GEEZ!! And I know I should be grateful that my kids have such involved grandparents....but can't they be really involved on Brian's watch and not mine.
Now today we are getting ready to go to the park to have pictures taken. I did NOT tell Brian about this. However, he has already texted me asking if we are doing anything fun. I refused to text back. I'm afraid if I even tell him we are going to a park, he will start searching the parks for us. ugh!!!
There is lot more I could go on about, but it is picture time!!! :D
If I were to have my way, we would be divorced by now. We would have a set schedule that was open to some flexibility with the kids, and we could all move on and live our separate but happy lives.
However, things are not happening to my liking. I am trying to be calm about it and just focus on the kids, but it IS frustrating. I am frustrated.
Once the child support amount was set Brian turned into a unreasonable person. He has since gotten another lawyer, and wants to "fight this". However, nothing is happening with him and his lawyer. I ask him 2x/week what his lawyer said, and what is the next step, and he keeps telling me that either a)Brian is busy or b) the lawyer hasn't gotten back in touch with him. I have contacted my lawyer too, and plan to procede on my own with the divorce. However, this will mean the divorce is contested and we will have a hearing which equals A LOT more money on both of our parts. GRRRR! So, I have been trying to get Brian to either tell me he wants to take it to hearing to fight the child support (his only disagreement in the entire paperwork that was drawn up), or that he compromises with me, and we just file together. He is just shuffling his feet and it is so frustrating. And the child support is figured out with a standard formula so that probably wouldn't change anyway. The only way it will change is if Brian fights for joint custody and gets it. This is ridiculous and scary to me at the same time. I won't go into big details about that, but that is pretty much one of my worst nightmares....if it could happen. Seeing as how he lives with his parents and never takes them overnight, etc.... I doubt a judge would rule things that way, but who knows.
Now the other frustration is how present he is in OUR lives. I understand he wants to be part of their lives, but I wish it could be more separate of mine! He wants to come over several evenings a week to just hang out and then read a couple bedtime stories to Z. I let him come over for the kids' sake, but I hate having him here all the time. I know maybe I should tell him not to, but I guess I decide I can suffer a little for the kids' happiness.
He also wants to do things still as a family and that is not in my agenda. I see my family now as the THREE of us, and he isn't included anymore in MY family. He is my kid's dad, but I want to do family things without him.
He often asks if he can do things with us. I try to avoid the topic or make excuses. This week was bad. He knew I was taking the kids to the zoo for ZooBoo. I was very excited about doing this with my kids. 3 minutes before I arrive at the zoo, he calls me. He informs me that HE is at the zoo, and wants to know if he can walk around with us. UGH!!!!!! WTF? Of course I let him. However, it was awkward and uncomfortable.....but slightly helpful I admit to have an extra pair of eyes and hands.
Then on Halloween he wants to go trick or treating with us. I let him of course, but what I didn't count on was his parents joining us too!! Seriously!! He told me they were coming over and taking some pictures and then leaving. Of course that was a lie. They came over and went with us to EVERY house. And it gets better. His mom was wearing a sweatshirt that had a picture of a goofy little boy, and underneath it read, "Proud grandmother of Zayden". LOL!! It is a little funny looking back now, but last night I was pissed. Oh and it still gets better. His mom has a sore leg so after the 3rd house, she went back to get her bright red suv, and then drove along the street beside us throughout the entire neighborhood, parking or pausing in the street in front of each house the kids went to!! This was NOT my idea of a fun time trick or treating as a family.
I did try to not let it get to me though, and I just focused on the kids last night, and enjoyed our evening despite the weirdness. But GEEZ!! And I know I should be grateful that my kids have such involved grandparents....but can't they be really involved on Brian's watch and not mine.
Now today we are getting ready to go to the park to have pictures taken. I did NOT tell Brian about this. However, he has already texted me asking if we are doing anything fun. I refused to text back. I'm afraid if I even tell him we are going to a park, he will start searching the parks for us. ugh!!!
There is lot more I could go on about, but it is picture time!!! :D
Friday, October 30, 2009
Halloween funny
Conversation tonight:
Me: What do you say when you walk up to someones door?
Z: Trick or treat.
Me: And then what do you say after someone gives you candy?
Z: thank you
Me: and what if someone says oh you look so cute. What do you say?
Z: thank you
Me: what do you say if someone says 'what are you supposed to be?'
Z: I am supposed to be done by now. You want to move it along with the three musketeers.
This last line he heard in a Halloween book we have written by Jerry Seinfeld. He always laughs at that part in the book but I had no idea he memorized that line. He had me laughing so hard tonight. And of course because I was laughing he kept saying it. Later I asked him again what he says when he goes up to someones door. And he just laughed and said 'you want to move it along with the three musketeers.'
I'm rethinking my decision of reading that book to him. Tomorrow night could be interesting. Hehe!
Me: What do you say when you walk up to someones door?
Z: Trick or treat.
Me: And then what do you say after someone gives you candy?
Z: thank you
Me: and what if someone says oh you look so cute. What do you say?
Z: thank you
Me: what do you say if someone says 'what are you supposed to be?'
Z: I am supposed to be done by now. You want to move it along with the three musketeers.
This last line he heard in a Halloween book we have written by Jerry Seinfeld. He always laughs at that part in the book but I had no idea he memorized that line. He had me laughing so hard tonight. And of course because I was laughing he kept saying it. Later I asked him again what he says when he goes up to someones door. And he just laughed and said 'you want to move it along with the three musketeers.'
I'm rethinking my decision of reading that book to him. Tomorrow night could be interesting. Hehe!
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Ivy is getting a reputation
Yesterday was a beautiful day! We were outside playing in the afternoon with some nieghbor kids and their parents.
Zayden's pal Ethan and his mom Sarah were out and so was Ivy's pal Elijah and his mom Lori.
Sarah and Lori had never met before. She asked Lori how old her son was as Lori was holding him while Ivy was running around with the big boys.
Lori told her that he was 6 days older than Ivy. Sarah's response; "Well, Ivy will roughen him up. Just let him hang out with her for a little bit and he will turn into a crazy kid too!"
Is it odd that I felt pride with that comment? ;)
Zayden's pal Ethan and his mom Sarah were out and so was Ivy's pal Elijah and his mom Lori.
Sarah and Lori had never met before. She asked Lori how old her son was as Lori was holding him while Ivy was running around with the big boys.
Lori told her that he was 6 days older than Ivy. Sarah's response; "Well, Ivy will roughen him up. Just let him hang out with her for a little bit and he will turn into a crazy kid too!"
Is it odd that I felt pride with that comment? ;)
Monday, October 26, 2009
15 and 37
I haven't been blogging as much lately, as I have not had a computer. :( Blech!! However, I am borrowing a computer right now, and will have my own (from work) tomorrow. I hope it works okay....I heard horror stories.
Anyway I just wanted to write some updates on the kids as I haven't written much about them lately.
Ivy is 15 months old now and is just so full of personality now. Gosh, I love this girl!! She still doesn't talk a lot (not nearly as much as her brother did at this age). She has said maybe 15-20 words, but usually only will say 2-3 words on any given day. Luckily her most common word is "mama". :D She has learned quite a few animal sounds, and does probably close to 10 of those including: cow, duck, snake, tiger, sheep, horse, owl, dog, etc.. She also is really good at pointing at objects when named. She is a smarty pants even if she isn't expressing it lately. She is obsessed with books right now. She will seriously sit for hours and listen to books now and point at pictures. I LOVE it! I do admit though I do get a little tired of reading the same book 17 times in a row. If she really likes a book, she will start throwing a fit as I am reading the last page to cue me to turn back to the first page to start again. She is also continuing to climb on everything. She also LOVES ride toys. She can go so fast on those things. Her little legs go flying, and she looks like a spider. I really think she can go faster than Zayden on those already. She also is extremely affectionate. She gives hugs and kisses all day long, and loves to cuddle. I confess....she is perfect. LOL!
Zayden is also doing great as always! He makes me laugh out loud constantly. I wish I had time to write down all the funny things he says. I have so many people now that tell me how funny they think my son is.
Here is a story I have to share from 2 days ago that I still laugh about when I think about it.
He was sitting on my lap facing me and we were talking this was our conversation:
Me: You are so cute.
Z: I look like a girl
Me: What? Why do you think that?
Z: Because I have brown eyes and long hair.
Me: Who said you look like a girl?
Z: Everyone says that?
Me: Like who?
Z: Everyone says I am too pretty to be a boy.
Me: *laughing* Well, I think you are very handsome. You have handsome eyes, and a cute nose, and a very handsome smile.
Z: I think you are really pretty with that big nose and those big teeth.
Me: *Laughing so hard I couldn't speak*
Z: And those big eyes, and that big mouth, and those long skinny lips.
Me: *laughing until I am crying*
Z: *laughing*
He continues to love to play with guys ALL. THE. TIME. He is also still into rescue heroes, but plays with other guys too such as pirates, knights, superheros, etc... I still try to get him to work on his finemotor skills. Yesterday I tried to get him to color, and he pretended that the crayons were a family, and had them all start interacting and talking with each other. :)
He also is becoming more outgoing. If we are in a public place such as a park. He goes up to other kids and introduces himself, and sometimes asks them to play with him. He also talks more to adults now too. I am getting a lot of comments lately about how well he speaks. It is interesting to me because he has been speaking well for his age, but I think now because he is more outgoing others are noticing. I had a friend come over who teaches first grade a few weeks ago. She went on and on about how bright he was, and how she couldn't believe all the complex thoughts he was having etc... I felt proud at that, but then later on Zayden told her he just turned 3, and she said, "No, I think you are 4." She then looked at me and said, "Isn't he 4?" I beamed with pride as I told her he was right, and that he just turned 3. :D
Okay, I admit it....he is perfect. LOL!!!
Anyway I just wanted to write some updates on the kids as I haven't written much about them lately.
Ivy is 15 months old now and is just so full of personality now. Gosh, I love this girl!! She still doesn't talk a lot (not nearly as much as her brother did at this age). She has said maybe 15-20 words, but usually only will say 2-3 words on any given day. Luckily her most common word is "mama". :D She has learned quite a few animal sounds, and does probably close to 10 of those including: cow, duck, snake, tiger, sheep, horse, owl, dog, etc.. She also is really good at pointing at objects when named. She is a smarty pants even if she isn't expressing it lately. She is obsessed with books right now. She will seriously sit for hours and listen to books now and point at pictures. I LOVE it! I do admit though I do get a little tired of reading the same book 17 times in a row. If she really likes a book, she will start throwing a fit as I am reading the last page to cue me to turn back to the first page to start again. She is also continuing to climb on everything. She also LOVES ride toys. She can go so fast on those things. Her little legs go flying, and she looks like a spider. I really think she can go faster than Zayden on those already. She also is extremely affectionate. She gives hugs and kisses all day long, and loves to cuddle. I confess....she is perfect. LOL!
Zayden is also doing great as always! He makes me laugh out loud constantly. I wish I had time to write down all the funny things he says. I have so many people now that tell me how funny they think my son is.
Here is a story I have to share from 2 days ago that I still laugh about when I think about it.
He was sitting on my lap facing me and we were talking this was our conversation:
Me: You are so cute.
Z: I look like a girl
Me: What? Why do you think that?
Z: Because I have brown eyes and long hair.
Me: Who said you look like a girl?
Z: Everyone says that?
Me: Like who?
Z: Everyone says I am too pretty to be a boy.
Me: *laughing* Well, I think you are very handsome. You have handsome eyes, and a cute nose, and a very handsome smile.
Z: I think you are really pretty with that big nose and those big teeth.
Me: *Laughing so hard I couldn't speak*
Z: And those big eyes, and that big mouth, and those long skinny lips.
Me: *laughing until I am crying*
Z: *laughing*
He continues to love to play with guys ALL. THE. TIME. He is also still into rescue heroes, but plays with other guys too such as pirates, knights, superheros, etc... I still try to get him to work on his finemotor skills. Yesterday I tried to get him to color, and he pretended that the crayons were a family, and had them all start interacting and talking with each other. :)
He also is becoming more outgoing. If we are in a public place such as a park. He goes up to other kids and introduces himself, and sometimes asks them to play with him. He also talks more to adults now too. I am getting a lot of comments lately about how well he speaks. It is interesting to me because he has been speaking well for his age, but I think now because he is more outgoing others are noticing. I had a friend come over who teaches first grade a few weeks ago. She went on and on about how bright he was, and how she couldn't believe all the complex thoughts he was having etc... I felt proud at that, but then later on Zayden told her he just turned 3, and she said, "No, I think you are 4." She then looked at me and said, "Isn't he 4?" I beamed with pride as I told her he was right, and that he just turned 3. :D
Okay, I admit it....he is perfect. LOL!!!
Friday, October 16, 2009
Granny
Some kids have make believe friends. Z now has a make believe "granny". Today while we were driving home he told me he wanted/ had 2 moms. He then changed his story to him only having one mom, but also having a granny. Here are some of the things I can remember that he told me about his granny.
She gives him lots and lots of candy!!!! He mentioned this several times.
She has blue hair.
She wears a blue hood.
She has red buttons on her shirt.
She is really nice.
Ivy likes her too.
She lives far away in a black house.
She drives a big truck.
She takes Z for picnics, but not ivy.... Just the 2 of them.
He visits her when I am at work.
She gives z treats like fruit bars.
Right now she is sick. Poor granny.
He told Brian all about her tonight too.
She gives him lots and lots of candy!!!! He mentioned this several times.
She has blue hair.
She wears a blue hood.
She has red buttons on her shirt.
She is really nice.
Ivy likes her too.
She lives far away in a black house.
She drives a big truck.
She takes Z for picnics, but not ivy.... Just the 2 of them.
He visits her when I am at work.
She gives z treats like fruit bars.
Right now she is sick. Poor granny.
He told Brian all about her tonight too.
Monday, September 28, 2009
Breaking my heart.
Zayden was full of conversation today as I was driving the kids to Alina's house for the day.
I am already feeling really sad about all the changes the kids are going through ( daddy not living with us and now me working more and spending less time with them).
Today Z just crushed me. He woke up saying he was mad at somebody. But then he dropped it.
In the car we had this conversation:
z: I see a star. It is a shooting star.
Me: if it's a shooting star you can make a wish.
Z: I wish......I was at home.
Then this conversation:
Z: I am mad at somebody.
Me: are you sad?
Z: no I am mad.
Me: are you mad at me?
Z: no I not mad at you. I am mad at the world.
I am already feeling really sad about all the changes the kids are going through ( daddy not living with us and now me working more and spending less time with them).
Today Z just crushed me. He woke up saying he was mad at somebody. But then he dropped it.
In the car we had this conversation:
z: I see a star. It is a shooting star.
Me: if it's a shooting star you can make a wish.
Z: I wish......I was at home.
Then this conversation:
Z: I am mad at somebody.
Me: are you sad?
Z: no I am mad.
Me: are you mad at me?
Z: no I not mad at you. I am mad at the world.
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Mr. Compassion
One trait that I am seeing more and more in Z's personality is compassion. This makes my heart happy!
The first time I noticed this was last winter. We were driving somewhere, and we passed a van that had gone off the road and was in a ditch. Z asked me why the van was there, and I told him my guess, and then he insisted that we go help them! I explained that there wasn't much I could do to help, especially since I had 2 kids with me, but that the police would help them. He was pretty upset about this situation.
Since then I have seen this compassion several times amongst other people, and sometimes even towards our dog, Kramer.
Well, now the last couple of weeks Z has grown to love all creatures including all insects and spiders! He will NOT let me kill a bug/spider in the house anymore!
Last week he came home one day all upset. I asked him what was wrong, and he told me that a bee had died at grandmas, and that made him really sad. He brought it up like 3 times that night.
Another day last week, I saw a spider in his room. I went to get it (and kill it) and Zayden literally grabbed my arms and told me "No mommy!! It's nice. Don't hurt it!"
A few days ago there was some beetle in the house, and I went to get it. He was watching, so I was going to just try to scoop it up and put it outside. However, I think he thought I was going to hurt it, so he came running up and scolded me again, and told me that it was nice, etc...
(by the way the beetle and spider are probably still living in this house. *shudder*)
Now today we were outside, and I hear him say, "Mommy look at this beautiful fly! It is so beautiful!" I walk over to him and he is holding a dead moth. I agree with him that it is beautiful, and then take it from him and lay it in the grass. We were getting ready to leave, and as I was putting him in his car, he was saying, "He needs his son, and dad, and mommy. He is all alone, etc..." I told him that I thought he would find some friends soon, and then Z seemed happy.
I can't help but wonder if this is a quality he will always have, and that it will continue to grow and evolve as he gets older, and that gives me so much hope and happiness.
The first time I noticed this was last winter. We were driving somewhere, and we passed a van that had gone off the road and was in a ditch. Z asked me why the van was there, and I told him my guess, and then he insisted that we go help them! I explained that there wasn't much I could do to help, especially since I had 2 kids with me, but that the police would help them. He was pretty upset about this situation.
Since then I have seen this compassion several times amongst other people, and sometimes even towards our dog, Kramer.
Well, now the last couple of weeks Z has grown to love all creatures including all insects and spiders! He will NOT let me kill a bug/spider in the house anymore!
Last week he came home one day all upset. I asked him what was wrong, and he told me that a bee had died at grandmas, and that made him really sad. He brought it up like 3 times that night.
Another day last week, I saw a spider in his room. I went to get it (and kill it) and Zayden literally grabbed my arms and told me "No mommy!! It's nice. Don't hurt it!"
A few days ago there was some beetle in the house, and I went to get it. He was watching, so I was going to just try to scoop it up and put it outside. However, I think he thought I was going to hurt it, so he came running up and scolded me again, and told me that it was nice, etc...
(by the way the beetle and spider are probably still living in this house. *shudder*)
Now today we were outside, and I hear him say, "Mommy look at this beautiful fly! It is so beautiful!" I walk over to him and he is holding a dead moth. I agree with him that it is beautiful, and then take it from him and lay it in the grass. We were getting ready to leave, and as I was putting him in his car, he was saying, "He needs his son, and dad, and mommy. He is all alone, etc..." I told him that I thought he would find some friends soon, and then Z seemed happy.
I can't help but wonder if this is a quality he will always have, and that it will continue to grow and evolve as he gets older, and that gives me so much hope and happiness.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Funny stories about school!
Zayden was telling me more about his day at school yesterday, and was talking about the other kids. I love to hear his take on things!
Yesterday I was asking him about the other kids in his class. He first complained again that most of the kids don't want to play with him. Many of the kids in his class are still 2, so he is one of the older ones, so I realize that many 2 years olds don't really play together. However, Z does play with some of his friends like Fintan and Ethan. He loves to play WITH them and interact with them, not just play beside them. So, I think it is hard for him to have all these kids around that aren't playing WITH him, and are rather just doing their own thing. He did say yesterday that one kid did play with him for a little bit. I asked Z what his name was, and Z said, "It's not a boy it's a girl." So I asked what her name was and he couldn't remember. He said that they chased each other. ;) So it starts!! :D
Then he told me that there is a boy in his class named Matthew who is really sad. I asked him if Matthew cries sometimes, and he said "No, A lot of times!....and Matthew can't talk!"
Then Z said there was another boy in his class named Sam. I asked him if he liked Sam, and he said, "Sam talks all crazy. I can't understand him."
Yesterday I was asking him about the other kids in his class. He first complained again that most of the kids don't want to play with him. Many of the kids in his class are still 2, so he is one of the older ones, so I realize that many 2 years olds don't really play together. However, Z does play with some of his friends like Fintan and Ethan. He loves to play WITH them and interact with them, not just play beside them. So, I think it is hard for him to have all these kids around that aren't playing WITH him, and are rather just doing their own thing. He did say yesterday that one kid did play with him for a little bit. I asked Z what his name was, and Z said, "It's not a boy it's a girl." So I asked what her name was and he couldn't remember. He said that they chased each other. ;) So it starts!! :D
Then he told me that there is a boy in his class named Matthew who is really sad. I asked him if Matthew cries sometimes, and he said "No, A lot of times!....and Matthew can't talk!"
Then Z said there was another boy in his class named Sam. I asked him if he liked Sam, and he said, "Sam talks all crazy. I can't understand him."
Thursday Gratitudes!!
Right now I am so mad at my ex, I could scream.....but I will not blog about that today. This blog is meant for me to share the great things about my children and our life together. So for now I will blog about what I am grateful for:
1. I am grateful for being able to be a single mom who can manage working only 4 days/week.
2. I am grateful for the company car I will be getting next week.
3. I am grateful that my kids are in great hands when I am at work.
4. I am grateful that my "team leader" at my new job is supposed to be the "coolest and best one" there! :D
5. I am grateful that I have lost almost 15 pounds in the last 2 months!
1. I am grateful for being able to be a single mom who can manage working only 4 days/week.
2. I am grateful for the company car I will be getting next week.
3. I am grateful that my kids are in great hands when I am at work.
4. I am grateful that my "team leader" at my new job is supposed to be the "coolest and best one" there! :D
5. I am grateful that I have lost almost 15 pounds in the last 2 months!
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
My ex is a Jackass!!
I don't want to go in details, but I just had to get that out!! Our nice simple divorce is turning into a fight that will probably end up in court just because he doesn't want to pay the child support that is required based on the Indiana state formula. He is getting his own lawyer tomorrow, and he is being pretty much a jackass about everything now.
I am beyond frustrated!!
Mostly I worry that he will fight for more visitation with the kids ONLY so he won't pay as much child support. But I don't want to lose ANY more time with my kids!! I don't care about the money. I just want what's fair.
I also am mad that now I will have extra lawyer and court fees, and this will make our divorce drawn out longer. I just want it all to be over with like yesterday! Ugh!
Okay venting session over. Next post will be about how awesome my kids are as usual! ;)
I am beyond frustrated!!
Mostly I worry that he will fight for more visitation with the kids ONLY so he won't pay as much child support. But I don't want to lose ANY more time with my kids!! I don't care about the money. I just want what's fair.
I also am mad that now I will have extra lawyer and court fees, and this will make our divorce drawn out longer. I just want it all to be over with like yesterday! Ugh!
Okay venting session over. Next post will be about how awesome my kids are as usual! ;)
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