Zayden Funnies

Z: I can't nurse Ivy.
Me: No, you can't.
Z: She might bite off my boobies!

B: We are having hamburgers tonight for dinner.
Z: I don't want any meat on my hamburger!

Z: What is that?
Me: It's a dead mouse (encounted during a walk)
Z: Is it crawling?
Me: No
Z: Why not?
Me: Well......it can't crawl.
Z: It is taking a nap. The mouse is very tired. It needs to eat cheese.
Me: Yes, mice do eat cheese
Z: And straw!

Z: What is this mommy?
Me: Ummmm that is your scrotum.....umm your testicles.
Z: I don't like them. I don't want them.
Me: Well, sweetie that is part of you, you can't take it off.
Z: Do you have a scrotum?
Me: No, only boys have those.
Z: You can buy one at the store!

Z: A bad guy came and took Ethan (neighbor boy)
Me: What? Where did he take him?
Z: He put him in jail!

B: Zayden, do you want to drive us home?
Z: I can't daddy.
B: Why not?
Z: Because a police officer might arrest me. (Okay he is too smart!!)